(Photographer; Mia Emmert)

This Monday April 6th at 10am central time you can hear my live interview with Blake Boles and Abbi Miller, two experienced advisers at the much lauded Not Back to School Camp. They also happen to be the globetrekking  organizers of Unschool Adventures, planning immersion trips worldwide for untethered teens. Blake is about to publish a book about how to attend college without high school.

We will have much to talk about! Unschooling teens and young adults listen in and get an earful of how much fun you can have exploring the big blue room with these fabulous organizers. To talk to our guests call 347-633-9765 or join us in the chat room.

There is this gem of a book I take out once or twice a year to make myself feel calmer.  I’m not talking about that Tao te Ching, although that works too. In this case, it is in regards to child rearing. But it is not a how-to book. It was written in 1946 by Gesell, Ilg and Ames and revised a few times since. The main name you might recognize is of Arnold Gesell, a prominent figure in the world of child development back in the day. The book is simply called The Child from Five to Ten

He and his co-scientists studied a wide range of young children up to age ten in England and wrote a book about typical ranges of behavior. It has that quaint 50’s feel in writing style, like an old b&w documentary you’re being forced to watch at the end of May in your swelteringly hot 9th grade gym class. The lilting cadences, the reassuring tones, the subtle humor, they all combine to make me feel vaguely sleepy and alright with the world. This is a commodity many a harrowed parent needs and cannot find in today’s parenting tomes which focus largely instead on huge behavioral problems and their pharmaceutical solutions.

There are so many extremely amusing examples I could insert here from the book to convince you of its value. But here is one that was particularly reassuring to me recently.

‘There is a definite contrast between the table manners of an 8-year-old at home and away from home. When a parent becomes too discouraged with the eight-year-old at home, she needs only to take him out to a restaurant or to invite a friend over for dinner! The stimulus is often sufficient spur to reveal latent possibilities, although it does not follow that the child will easily maintain the higher level.’

It goes on to describe how bolting down food, burping and demanding dessert early in the meal are common concerns, and although these children aged 8ish are likely to stay fairly well seated they are not beyond bending in half to look under the table a bit, or picking a fight with a sibling somehow. Oh yeah, they interrupt conversations with their own unrelated thoughts, drop their napkins a lot and play with the silverware. It doesn’t mention the occasional eating with your hands issues some of us still struggle to suppress, but you get the point. The book even suggests you seat said kid near to you to make it possible for you to give subtle hints about breaches in etiquette. Now, isn’t that hilarious? You mean, I do not have a hyper crazed society wrecking future hermit caveman on my hands? I don’t have to send anyone to finishing school? I have to practice the lost art of subtle hints with a child? This sounds…doable.

Of course, it does ultimately address more serious issues, like anger and agression, but still with the sense that these are expression that humans have within paremeters of their development, so no need to freak.

If you read on in the categories of motor skills, personal hygiene, ethical sense, philosophic outlook, fears and dreams, etc..you will walk a way with a strangely calm feeling that perhaps your kid is right on track with his or her development, or at least in a normal range of on track, and that is something you can live with. Now isn’t that a message most adults could use a huge does of?

This Monday (March 23rd) at 10 am (central time) I will be talking with Jean Kulczyk about homeschooling and unschooling the special needs child. Jean has advocated for years for special needs children and has helped  countless families to adapt their ways to best suit their special needs child’s learning styles. Please join us with your questions and stories live or in the chat room.
Call in number 347-633-9765

My kids were happy participants in this HWT project. I enjoyed reading some of the sample letters to President Obama, since I recall my son’s was a bit forthright as well. Mainly because he was writing as neatly as possible and didn’t feel the need to mince words. My daughter wasn’t so initimidated by the handwriting process so she went on for quite a bit with her advice. Anyway, amusing and nice to know that over 30 thousand children had something to share with their commmander-in-chief.

I’ve read quite a few books about western frontier settlers and Nordic explorers who settle in a new place in spring and summer and live the high life for a few months. All the time they remember their experiences from home so they prepare for winter diligently, worrying about how they’ll house the livestock and if there will be enough fire wood.

Then winter comes, and the last of the harvest parties fades in to a distant memory. Instead of pumpkin pie they are counting the gourds hanging in the eaves and wondering if that’ll hold them for stews. The hunter goes out to hunt and brings back something now and then but soon the snow is so high that it threatens to cover the scant light from the windows and the ice storms manage to pelt the residents through the small spaces that have been worn away between the logs due to wind and cold. The livestock has long been brought inside but the grains are running low for them and the goat is starting to eat the wicker baskets.  All anyone cooks anymore is oatcakes or a thin turnip soup and the baby goes and gets a fever. Now mother and father are not just skinnier and worried looking they are almost ghostly in appearance as they use every ounce of energy to submerge their worries and keep functioning. But cabin fever, lack of vitamins and sunshine, sick children and a gloomy feeling are starting to make them a little coo coo. Father is no longer making a fiddle from scratch. He sanded it down to the nub and then one morning it was gone and you swear you saw something fiddleshaped in the morning fire. Mother no longer sings while she chops turnips to entertain the children. She just walks around like a robot and sleeps the rest of the time. And still the snow keeps coming down.

That is the point I feel we have reached symbolically here, as a nation, and maybe just a wee bit as a people battered down by winter’s ceaselessness. Okay, I haven’t turned zombie and run out of turnips. But I have noticed that the pasta stores are getting freakishly low, and I sure as heck haven’t been blasting the Ramones while I chop up veggies for hearty soups. I’ve been listening the the news instead and feeling my shoulders sag a millimeter more with each awful financial crisis and each layoff  of Chicago employees. Every rare trip to the movie theaters or restaurants I get with friends I can’t help but quietly note to myself how few people there are in these normally booming places. Everyone I know who has a child has had a cold or flu peaking in the past few weeks, and I listen for Obama’s voice on the radio with he same intensity with which Half Pint listened for Pa’s gunshots when he went out to scare away the wolves.

Like the nordic explorers every day I scan the horizon for signs of spring and summer. A couple of red birds in a tree. A multibillion dollar stimulus package.  A construction crew pulling a ditch witch up to a crumbly Chicago sidestreet. A new method for appointing senator’s for Illinois? A crocus emerging from the snow which has finally retreated to below boot level. Who knows if these signs bode well or ill for our future? All I know is it has made me put down the soup spoon and stare out the window briefly while recalling the Andersonville Midsommarfest, the Celtic Fest, the outdoor film festival,the Fiesta del Sol, all day concerts which close down the street at the Hideout, the beer festival at Goose Island, and long fridays at the beach with our homeschooling group. Days when it seems like summer could never end. Days when the baby never gets a fever and the garden tomatoes are so plentiful you hand them out to strangers at the neighborhood yard sales. I’m longing still Chicago.

Overheard amongst the teen population at a certain birthday gathering last night, “I wish I was born in ‘77, because that’s when punk was born!”

Although there is no official birthday of punk, the kid was not exactly off the mark. I wanted to be amused that these dear 12 and 13-year-olds were embracing the punk culture, and I wanted to smuggly snort and expound on how much closer my generation was to the heart of punk. But as I was firmly chewing my tongue off so as not to embarrass anyone with my DNA, it dawned on me that while punk was being birthed by invasive c-section in 1977 (or so) I was about the same age these kids before me were at now. And I’m pretty sure I wasn’t in the original line up of Warsaw. So yeah, I wished I was there too when it all began instead of sitting in my room listening to Dr. Demento on the radio while playing with my Star Wars action figures.

(My kids during a class on how to use watercolors)

You might know Sharon of Visual Manna from my radio interview of her a few weeks ago. She is having a very well priced introductory special on her art lessons for kids. These lessons are live and one-on-one with her via Skype. She really puts a lot of art history and theory in to them while at the same time conveying real art techniques. If you’ve been meaning to get your kids art lessons for ages and haven’t gotten around to it, this is a great way to get them started and spare yourself tons of driving. They’ll love it.

“FREE Artsy Animals workshop for little ones.   Sharon Jeffus, author and art educator will be taking children on a delightful journey about animals and their habitats.  We will be looking at wonderful master works of art and learning how to draw using basic shapes.  Fine motor skills will be enhanced while children go to far away places where these delightful animals live via the internet…..multisensory learning takes place every minute of this delightful program.  Program happens March 3, 2009 at 11:30 central time.   Email us for link and supplies needed you have on hand at visualmanna@gmail.com.
Call 1-888-2757309 for more information.

Special Live Internet Offer!

FOUR LESSONS of one and a half hours each for only $10 a lesson. If you buy 4 lesson you get one free.

EACH LESSON WILL DISCUSS FOUR MASTER ARTISTS:

1. LESSON ONE WILL EXPLORE WAYS OF MAKING THINGS LOOK REAL WHEN DRAWING.  ONE FINISHED COMPOSITION WILL BE COMPLETED. STUDENTS CAN CONTACT TEACHER VIA EMAIL AND ALSO SCAN AND EMAIL THEIR FINISHED WORK FOR COMMENT.

2. Lesson two will cover one and two point perspective.  We will learn how to draw houses, cities, rooms and bridges in perspective.  One finished drawing will be completed.  We will look at architecture around the world.

3. Lesson three will explore color and how to mix and blend.  Master artists use of atmospheric perspective will be shown.  The colorwheel and how to shade with a complement will also be done.  A completed work in color will be finished in this lesson.

4. Lesson four will show the basics of painting.  We will paint on watercolor paper and do a finished picture.

5. Lesson five is FREE if you order all four lessons.  We will do scupture and study famous sculptures and how to do them.

We will start February 2nd.  Contact us for other starting dates.”

(trying out some Latin spells at one In-Home Conference)

Relaxed Homeschooler Talk Radio show #11 is up for the In-Home Conference!

It may be earlier than usual (8am central time this Monday) but join me as the midwestern posse of homeschoolers revs up for the upcoming In-Home Conference. I’ll have several guests from the conference world joining us to speak on the topics of conference highlights, volunteer opportunities, and the overall benefits of hanging out for a long weekend in a hotel with hundreds of other similar minded friends. It’ll be a blast! Call to speak to Portia O’Laughlin, Alice Muciek, Laura Enders and a few surprise guests and callers and get your burning conference questions answered. We welcome  your favorite conference experiences from all over.

Those details again:

Where: Relaxed Homeschooler Talk Radio

To talk to us during show 347-633-9765

When:
Feb. 9th Monday morning 8am Chicago time

What: In-Home Conference talk

Who:
You and other people who have something to say about the
conference.

(Our artist friend Johanna showed Mail how to make clay landscapes)

Do you learn through hearing? Well, I guess we all do to some extent. Up until very recently it seemed my kids could only learn through movement. To this day they still fidget and do things like knitting or push-ups while listening to books on tape or their parents reading them something. My son’s piano teacher calls him the noodler, because he is constantly noodling on the piano in between moments of instruction. This penchant for movement will probably never change, and I am glad that in most cases we are in a place where moving and learning aren’t mutually exclusive.

Still, now that they are getting older I notice long stretches of silence in the house. An hour will go by with very little fanfare. One kid might be lying on the bed reading, while another might be sculpting a tiny village with sculpey.

On a normal day with not much running about needed, there might be some listening to audiobooks, watching a documentary, writing of short stories and comic books, making of movies,building of 3-D mazes, exploring physics with experiments or collaborative presentations prepared online with friends. Reading this, you might think I am exaggerating or have extraordinarily ambitious children. Not at all. There are days when projects are slim or not happening too, but in short, (are you listening new homeschooling parents?) homeschooling or unschooling my kids has become everything I hoped and dreamed it would become for them when we began this journey 8 years ago. More experienced homeschoolers told me this many times over the years. Trust them. Follow their interests. Let them set the pace. Don’t fuss over what exactly needs to be done and when but listen instead to where they are and what they need. At times that sounded like a bunch of mumbo jumbo designed to calm a jittery newbie. Or it sounded hopelessly vague. Describe how exactly one can follow an interest please ma’am? Should I buy every dinosaur book ever printed and plan a vacation around a dig for my 5 year old? Oh, I’ve overdone it at first like most parents who only want their kids to have passions which drive them to satisfying careers.

Nevertheless, over the years things have calmed down clearly and we’ve reached a point where the kids can live and learn and I can not spazz about it so much. In some part this is due to my maturing and gaining experience and finding a coffee with lower doses of caffeine. But I’ve done some reflecting and I now know that in another large part this is due to the fact that technology has been a tool which suits our natures and learning styles. Yes, I wanted my kids to grow up like Laura Ingalls and they have had their fair share of shooting bows and arrows, building with their hands, canning jams, gardening, stalking footprints in the woods and building survival shelters (well, mostly just for fun on a hot afternoon in the nearby woods). I’ve been careful to convey my favorite things about childhood to them, namely the outdoors. But in the meantime they have been conveying some of their favorite things about childhood to me.

There is something to be had for audio and kinesthetic learners in the world of computers, DVD’s, podcasts, radio, television, video gaming and social networks. Not convinced? I’ll argue what isn’t there and comprehensive in some other post, but here are some examples of how it does work:

Social networks- I finally have a kid old enough to use one. In addition to keeping up to the minute on who posted a goofy video of themselves versus who is out of a committed relationship, there is also the grapevine on clubs and activities. Yes, it turns out, homeschoolers do have a social life and technology really helps them to organize it and share the joys and pitfalls of it.

Video- I mean, not just the ones you get from Netflix but also the documentaries and endless educational videos available on Youtube. Last month we were stuck on the concept of Newton’s first law of motion, we simply had to pop over to Youtube to see about 20 student projects describing unbalanced forces in 20 different ways. When an interest pops up, be it Jane Austen or black holes, we simply have to go rearrange our queue at Netflix and in some cases we can watch them immediately.

Podcasts,radio and books on tape- As I type my son stands behind me spinning poi and listening to the end of Coraline on CD. It came from the library and he is hooked. Some books we get from iTunes or the bookstore or the library, some on tape and some in print. Some we listen to in the car only to make the drive fly, others at bedtime. Some we read aloud to each other or silently. Some we have book club meetings over or impromptu family discussions. We get each other interested and take turns reading books we love. Just recently I started a weekly playlist for the kids. The current one has introductory Japanese lessons, Spanish lessons, beginner German lessons, some Schoolhouse Rock songs about grammar, a chapter from a history audio book we’re all reading on the side and a science podcast that always blows our minds. I’ve got plans to add some public domain books read on podcasts and a fabulous history show on BBC called In Our Time. But we’re starting off easy.

Video Games-Well, obviously the Wii was our greatest investment ever in games. The kids do yoga, skateboarding and dancesteps when the snow is piled 16 inches deep outside and ice storms rage. They also take part in design challenges and read about the world news on the Wii. Lets not even talk about the vocabulary building Wii game we all play where my vocabulary is consistently rated far below my own inflated image of it!

Now, needless to say, when we were kids there was mainly the TV, the telephone and Atari. Nobody would have argued much that these were great educational tools, although they served their purposes well. But they evolved and although initially resistent, I am a dedicated user of technology to further my connection with the world. Of couse like all tools, there is the possibility of overdependence.  But Spring is on its way and the warm air, the smell of dirt and the cheeping of birds will see to it that we keep things in balance.